She just sent me an email with a link to a Wellness Center because she is worried about my weight. Recently I've been just angry with her on the inside. Basically, I found a bunch of pictures of when I was in High School and even after High School (not that long ago, really) and I look just fine, even when she saw them she said, "Wow! You were so skinny!" But I remember even then having low self esteem when it came to my weight.
My point is that even when I was at my "healthiest" and fittest (surfing, running and kick boxing) all the time, I was still not happy and always saw myself as 'fat'.
Is this how it's going to be once I get the lap band and lose all the weight?
Will I even be confortable at my target weight?
I can't think of any day in the last 15++ years when I have not thought about my weight, or what I'm eating or how I look. I cry when I think about that.
That's all. Sorry for the depressing post. My mom (who doesn't even know about my blog or that i'm getting a lap band) put me in a bad mood.
Hope you have a better Saturday than me.....
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